Balancing being a woman, a wife, and mama is hard work. One thing I have found is that if I don’t put myself first. If I don’t prioritize time in my day for me, then I cannot be the wife my husband needs, the mama my children need, and build the home environment that we all need to be our best. It’s not easy to find time for me with two children under three and one more on the way. But I make it happen because I know that nobody is responsible for making me happy except for myself.
I make “me time” a priority because it makes me a better, happier person. I believe strongly in the saying “happy wife, happy life.” Mothers play a strong role in setting mood and energy of the home environment. When I am my best self, eating healthily, exercising my body and mind, filling myself up with happy things—positivity radiates from me. This positivity reflects onto my husband, my children, and our home. Similarly, when I don’t have time for me, the negative energy flows from me and everything around me starts to unravel negatively. This is why I list me as the most important.
Second most important is the love relationship with my husband. Having a partner in life to share all of life’s joys and sorrows just makes life better. I know the love relationship takes different forms in different homes—it could be two woman partners or two male, it could be a mother and father that live in different homes, it could be just a mother or father alone. Whatever form it takes, children model our behavior. They learn more from what we do then what we say. When the relationship between my husband and me and is deep and strong and loving, when we are respectful and kind and supportive, our children see and feel this. I also know that our children will not always be with us, but my husband, my partner will be. We are just here to give our children roots and wings. Too many relationships end because other things were put first, the children, the career. But to me, I put my love relationship with my partner of highest importance because I know how special it is to have a partner to share the journey of life.
And now for the mama part. Being a mom is hardest, yet joyous and the most important work. We are our children’s greatest teachers. We are a model for them on even our hardest days. They feel what we are feeling. We can’t hide it from them. We need to be our best for them so they can be their best. I need to give my children undying love, acceptance, and a positive safe environment that helps them be their best self. Accepting that my children are their own independent little people has been huge for me. My children are not me. I have learned to accept them as they are and do my best to give them the tools to bring their unique talents into this world. I believe every person, starting as a brand new innocent little baby, has something to bring to the world. It is up to us as parents to give our children all that they need to uncover their passion, to strengthen it, and let it out and contribute to the world.